The Big Book of Jewish Conspiracies by David Deutsch and Joshua Neuman (St. Martin's Griffin), 269 pages, $19.95 paper. Rating: NNNN Rating: NNNN
There's nothing more ludicrous than a good Jewish conspiracy. And no book on the topic is funnier or smarter than The Big Book Of Jewish Conspiracies, by David Deutsch and Joshua Neuman, editors of the magazine Heeb: The New Jew Review.
No doubt some readers will take offence at this hilarious chronicle of Jew hatred's greatest hits, but the purpose of the book is to show the illogic of Jewish conspiracy theories.
They begin with their version of The Protocols Of The Learned Elders Of Zion, the (mythical) secret cabalistic plan for world domination. The elders in this case are Barbra Streisand representing the music industry, Jerry Springer representing broadcast journalism and Noam Chomsky representing higher education.
According to Deutsch and Neuman, every major historical event from Moses to 9/11 can be traced to a Jewish hand. In this satire, the crucifixion of Christ took place because Jesus ran a popular frat house in Jerusalem that made the Jewish priests jealous.
The American Revolution was the result of a bet by a Jewish gambler that he could get 20,000 people to move to Quebec. He and Benjamin Franklin, who was really a Polish Jew named Binyomin Frankel, conspired to bring about the revolution, causing the Loyalists to flee to Quebec bet won.
The assassination of JFK was arranged by a Jewish haberdasher angry that the president's great hair was destroying his hat business. Communism, Nazism, Wal-Mart are all explained as parts of a never-ending Jewish plot.
The superimposed image of a Ferris wheel behind a picture of Auschwitz may come across as the epitome of bad taste. However, one of the canards of real-world anti-Semitic Holocaust deniers is that the Nazi death camp had a swimming pool.
As the Big Book shows, the distance between intense irrational hatred and ludicrous parody is razor thin.