DANGEROUS DAN’S 714 Queen E, at Broadview, 416-463-7310, dangerousdansdiner.com. Rating: NNN
The Hours: Sunday and Tuesday to Thursday noon to 10 pm, Friday and Saturday noon to midnight. Closed Monday, some holidays.
The Minimum: $10
The Order: Elvis Burger ($5.99), Big Kervorkian burger ($6.99) with extra patty ($3.25), Cereal Killer sandwich ($6.65), large Greek salad ($6.45) and a small poutine ($4.45)
The Damage: $38.79 + $3 delivery = $41.79
The Wait (ETA vs Reality): 45 minutes/35 minutes
The Haul: The marijuana leaf beside some of the more esoteric items on this very greasy spoon's card - pan-fried cookie dough with ice cream in chocolate syrup, and the Colossal Colon Clogger Combo of a 24-ounce burger topped with two fried eggs and a quarter-pound of both bacon and cheese, sided with poutine and a shake, anyone? - suggests its key customers are stoners with the munchies.
That explains the Elvis (an 8-ounce freshly ground but overcooked beef patty dressed with fried bacon, peanut butter and mashed bananas), the Big K's extra onion rings, fried mushrooms, bacon and deep-fried pickle, and the Killer's KFC-style deep-fried chicken breast, all on grilled kaisers. We counter the abysmal poutine with the pseudo-healthy salad but ditch its weird balsamic dressing, thankfully on the side, for good ol' evo.
Although we're two blocks outside Dan's delivery area, we're told, "We'll do it this time because we're slow. If we're busy next time, we'll hang up."