I have a problem regarding my boyfriend's fantasy. I don't know if I'm the one freaking out about it, but he has a thing about me having sex with another guy and even wants me to tell him when I find a man hot. In my view, that is just wrong.
I don't like him to do that, but at the same time I feel selfish because I can't fully satisfy his needs. We tried to watch porn while having sex, and he's turned on by me staring at the screen and imagining that I'm having sex with the guy from the video.
We haven't done anything like this in a while, and he hasn't talked to me about doing those kinds of things. We had a couple of fights about it, and I really feel bad after each one of them because I truly want to meet his sexual needs. Please help me.We haven't done anything like this in a while, and he hasn't talked to me about doing those kinds of things. We had a couple of fights about it, and I really feel bad after each one of them because I truly want to meet his sexual needs. Please help me.
What we've got on our hands here is a classic cuckold fantasy. Of course there are a jillion theories about how this one got started, but if I explain what I know about it, let's see if it doesn't make a little more sense to you.
The term "cuckold" comes from the cuckoo bird. The female of this species has been known to lay her eggs in other cuckoos' nests so that she can party while someone else sees to her brood.
When a woman flies the coop and steps out to party without protection or discretion, her husband is known as a cuckold because he can never be certain if the kids he's raising are his own. The origins of the term are derogatory; the implication is that the man is a fool and everyone knows it.
How this becomes a fetish is as easy to explain as any other weird-ass thing people like to do. We do what excites us, and what excites us is often something that takes us careening into a part of our brain where we don't get to spend a lot of time because it's ancient, defies language and is hard to get to under mundane circumstances.
The survival of any species depends on getting the job done. I bet your boyfriend likes the idea of you fucking other guys because, in that part of his brain where he's a great horned buck teetering on the verge of extinction, he needs to get in there after that other guy and make you his. He's gotta fuck that guy's semen out of the way so that his can win. He's the man! (Picture him posing majestically on a cliff just after he's flouted death one more time.)
You want to satisfy your boyfriend? Then learn to play the game. Here is my suggestion: tell him about all the people you fucked on the way to work - in bathrooms, back alleys and pool halls. Tell him you were positively glistening with semen and that you could barely get it all off before you got to the office. Let him know that part of that deal is his rewarding you in return for your understanding and generosity.
Fantasies can't be met without discussion and mindfulness. He needs to be willing to open up and discuss the details as well as make sure you feel safe and attractive.
I've come to realize that my ejaculations don't project the way they used to. I used to be able to ejaculate so hard that my semen would shoot at least 2 feet. Also, there seemed to be more of it. I'm now in my mid-30s, and my wife and I are trying to have a baby. I'm wondering if the quantity of semen changes anything. Would it help if I got back my past ability to shoot further?
I've been recently diagnosed with type 1 diabetes. Is it possible that my illness has somehow altered my baby-making abilities?
Wanting Big Payload
Wow! Are you telling me that your doctor hasn't told you that diabetes can affect your erection and by extension your semen-shooting potential?
This is one of the most commonly observed side effects of diabetes in men. Your penis requires good blood flow to maintain a strong erection. The veins that deliver blood to the penis are affected by elevated blood sugar in the same way as those in the rest of your body.
It stands to reason that less sperm means less chance of conception, but it doesn't mean it won't happen. Please go to your doctor and talk about this. That's a really good idea.