ETERNITY: THE MOVIE (Ian Thorpe). 92 minutes. Opens Friday (October 24). For venues and times, see Movies. Rating: NN
This tone-challenged pic can’t decide whether it wants to be a sweet film about two guys in an 80s band, a satire of the music industry or an extended gay joke.
Naive aspiring pop star Todd (Barrett Crake) arrives in Hollywood, where he launches the blue-eyed soul band Eternity with saxophonist B.J. (Myko Olivier). They find spectacular success thanks to gay record exec Barry (John Gires), weather girl trouble – they’re both in love with Gina Marie (Nikki Leonti) – and when the band becomes popular, Todd loses his songwriting chops, which can only blossom during periods of emotional upset.
It’s satire for sure. The boys are meant to evoke Hall & Oates and Wham! – everyone assumes they’re queer.
But unlike Music And Lyrics, which featured those great mock-80s videos with has-been pop star Hugh Grant, Eternity: The Movie doesn’t show the same smarts or affection for the era. Todd comes across as dumb and the womanizing B.J. as crude.
There may be a small segment of the LGBTQ audience who will find this fun – the clothes are a hoot, the song lyrics ridiculous, and the gay innuendo constant – but it’s mostly just crass.
