PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: ON STRANGER TIDES directed by Rob Marshall, written by Ted Elliott and Terry Rossio, with Johnny Depp, Penélope Cruz, Ian McShane and Geoffrey Rush. A Disney release. 136 minutes. Opens Friday (May 20). See listing. Rating: NN
Pirates Of The Caribbean: On Stranger Tides would have us forget that the first three Pirates movies were the story of Will Turner and Elizabeth Swann, whose truest of loves led them into a mystical world of adventure – and whose story was tied up neatly at the end of the trilogy, freeing Orlando Bloom and Keira Knightley to move on.
Sure, Johnny Depp’s Cap’n Jack was involved in most of it, but he was a supporting character – a scene-stealing sidekick there to make mischief, bonk authority figures on the head and plot to steal back his beloved Black Pearl. Put him at the centre and Depp’s eccentricities have nothing to revolve around.
The new film finds Jack swept up in the race to find the fountain of youth. Also on the hunt, for reasons of their own, are the unkillable Captain Barbossa (Geoffrey Rush), Jack’s old flame Angelica (Penélope Cruz), the fearsome pirate Blackbeard (Ian McShane) and a flotilla of Spaniards. Also there are mermaids, because someone realized they’d left those out of the first three movies. Oh, and zombies, sort of.
There are many action scenes. Swords clash, barrels roll, coal wagons rain fire on cobblestone streets, pirates swing through a forest of coconut trees. It’s all very busy, and it’s been shot in 3-D, which means every stunt looks like a badly processed visual effect even when it isn’t.
I lay most of the blame at the feet of Rob Marshall (Chicago, Nine), who replaces Gore Verbinski at the helm of the series and has absolutely no feel for the material. His primary innovation is cutting the sword fights so rapidly that we can’t follow the action. Say what you will about Verbinski’s trilogy, it was at least elegant pirate movies demand a stylist, not a journeyman.
I will admit it’s fun to see Depp and Cruz together again. Who’d have thought the co-stars of Blow would end up fencing with each other 10 years later in a big, dumb Disney movie? And who thought that was a good idea?
normw@nowtoronto.com
