Rating: NN
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Dear Ashlee: Since Jessica’s too busy pretending her marriage isn’t a giant mess to share sage advice, I’m offering some sisterly wisdom. Get some perspective: in a year marred by horrific natural disasters, your SNL gaffe was really no biggie. Better to drop the “poor me” act and be all, like, “whatever.” Besides, you’re way more interesting when you’re all aggro and shit – the weird raspy metal-lite thing you do on the title track here is kinda hot. But stop contradicting yourself. Pulling the “I am me/I won’t change for anyone” deal when you’ve ditched the brunette 80s punk thing for a blond goth Gwen Stefani image is just lame. You also might wanna think about trying to record one nominally original track, or at least attempting to mask blatant ripoffs like the Hollaback-style L-O-V-E cheer or the Blondie-biting Dancing Alone. Further note: piano ballads = bad idea. Btw, you can’t be “doing so good.” Good is not an adverb. It’s “doing so well.” Sheesh. And ditch Daddy – he’s creepy.
