U2

Rating: N

It’s official – U2 have forgotten how to write a hook. Sadly, the band that gave us the 80s’ catchiest battle cry (Sunday Bloody Sunday) and the 90s’ best guitar solo (The Fly) has turned in yet another uninspired, piss-poor offering in the 2000s.

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The problems that litter No Line fall into two categories: mind-numbing blandness on the part of the band (as heard on the seven-minute trudge Moment Of Surrender and the hook-starved lead single, Get On Your Boots) or embarrassing, face-palm-inducing vocal choices by Bono (the jarring, insane-sounding falsetto jump in I’ll Go Crazy If I Don’t Go Crazy Tonight or the beat-poet-inspired lyrics to Breathe: “I wasn’t gonna buy just anyone’s cockatoo”).

In short, No Line is less Wild Horses, more Wild Honey. Epic fail.

Top track: No Line On The Horizon