WE'RE A HAPPY FAMILY (Columbia) Rating: NN Rating: NN
For all the stadium rock stars who've come out barking about how the Ramones defined their musical lives, you'd think they could put together a better tribute than the half-assed We're A Happy Family set. Rob Zombie might be a fine choice to curate a Russ Meyer film festival, but as his own bludgeoning of Blitzkrieg Bop shows, he's completely out of his element here. While there's some unintentional comedic value in Metallica trying to play sloppy, out-of-tune punks and KISS's horn-heavy stomp through Do You Remember Rock N' Roll Radio?, hearing U2 wheeze though Beat On The Brat is just sad. Garbage, Marilyn Manson and the Pretenders turn Ramones standards into their own bland tunes, stripping any excitement, energy and danger out of songs by what was once the most exciting band on the planet. The lone bright note is Tom Waits chugging like a locomotive through The Return Of Jackie And Judy. Gruesome.