DANKO JONES with the ILLUMINATI at Lee's Palace, October 10. Tickets: $13. Attendance: 500. Rating: NNNN Rating: NNN
Tchort Might never have managed to get it off the ground, but since former bassist Nick Sewell and guitarist Les Godfrey formed the Illuminati , it's been nothing but good things all around on the accolades front. Having taken their hillbilly rock-'n'-roll-wastrel look to a new level, these guys at a glance might be mistaken for anything from a Motörhead cover band to a trio of Southern blues rockers. But what they offered up at Lee's last Friday was some seriously well-put-together stompin' rock with complex, well-executed guitars backed by an ass-kicking rhythm section.
"They're so funny!" my friend shouted at me, referring to their total rock-'n'-rollness.
"I know!" I shouted back. "But is it on purpose?"
Big news came later in the set when the Illuminati announced that they'll be opening for Alice Cooper at Massey Hall on October 30.
Of course, many a lady was waiting impatiently for Danko Jones and his tongue to get going. True to form, the tongue made its first appearance mere seconds after the eminently fuckable rocker stepped onto the stage.
Apparently Danko, JC and Damon haven't been around Toronto much lately cuz they've been busy touring Europe and being way cool. That's a good thing, because if anyone deserves to get something out of the rock explosion, it's these guys. They do it way better than any of the bandwagon-jumpers out there.
Danko's such a bad boy, ripping up the guitar and spraying sweat all over the place, but you just know he's all sensitive and gushy inside and you just wanna swoon and cream, oops, I mean scream, "Oh Danko!" From the second they opened up the set, the band never dropped the energy ball, tearing from tune to tune mixing soul, punk, blues, boogie and good old rock and roll grind. And oh, those totally stupid lyrics.
There's such beauty in simplicity like "I want you. More than anything. I want you. More than anything. I want you. More than anything. I do. I do!" You can pretend he's talking about you.
OK, the tongue flicked around so much it kind of started to creep me out. I wonder whether it's a nervous tick and if so, does it only happen onstage? Does it happen at family gatherings? How about weddings and funerals? Other than that, it was a wicked ass-shakin' show, though they were fucking up a lot. At least that's what the Brown Panther (as Jones is calling himself now) said because he was seeing all kinds of people he hadn't seen in a long time and they were making him forget stuff.
I didn't notice, though.