It's pretty obvious that over the past few months Mayor Rob Ford has put Toronto (and, sure, even Canada) on the map. Who couldn't miss Canada, right? All tucked away down there!
Rob Ford's heaved us into a global spotlight: albeit one we often struggle to duck out of the line of, pulling our toques down over our blushing faces.
As if there was any lingering doubt that Ford has done bad things for a city that already struggles desperately to be "World Class" - nipping at the heels of New York and London and Berlin and Pittsburgh all "Hey me too, guys! Right?" - his name, and that of our adorable metropolis, have now become synonymous with bad behaviour and civic malfeasance. At least in Florida.
According to Athens Banner-Herald, where we get all our news, the mayor of Hampton, Florida (population 500) was arrested Monday on charges of possessing and selling oxycodone. Like Ford, Hampton Mayor Barry Layne Moore also has checkered past, including a 2012 charge for domestic battery. And they both like oxy. And they both have Florida mug shots (see above).
The kicker? The Bradford County Sheriff's statement following the arrest:
"This isn't Toronto," said Sheriff Gordon Smith. "We will not tolerate illegal drug activity in my jurisdiction by anyone to include [sic] our elected officials."
"This isn't Toronto!" What a cool warning! And from Florida, of all places: the swampy cultural bog that birthed Fred Durst! They're using us as an example!
Maybe now parents across the world will pull their misbehaving kids by the ears, waving their fingers all, "This isn't Toronto, young man! In this house we put our Xbox One controllers away!"
Is that a thing? Xbox One? Rob Ford looks like Chris Farley.