Bad news from America, gang.
Weekly news rag Time is already rounding out the year with a wash of Top 10 Lists. And our goodly mayor made the cut! It wasn’t for Top 10 Crack-Smoking Mayors or Top 10 Pro Sports Stadium Seat Thieves or anything like that. Rather, Ford showed up on the Top 10 Apologies list. And he didn’t even win!
The entry, “Rob Ford’s begging for forgiveness for smoking crack cocaine,” refers at once to Ford’s November 5 admission to using crack and, later, his apology for making off-colour comments about the All-U-Can-Eat cunnilingus buffet he’s got laid out for him at his Etobicoke home.
But it wasn’t enough to edge out racist diabetic clown Paula Deen, who apologized earlier this year for using the n-word, and generally cultivating a racially hostile work environment. The article also notes that Deen is opening a “new headquarters” in Buffalo, which will put her that much closer to Rob Ford, thus creating loads of potential opportunities for the two bloated embarrassments to meet, connect in a long, knowing stare deep into each other’s empty eyes, and then go Lady-and-the-Tramp on a yard of butter.
Time also named Ridley Scott and Cormac McCarthy’s hypnotic, enigmatic maybe-masterpiece The Counselor as one of the worst movies of 2013, proving that they have no idea what they’re talking about. History will vindicate The Counselor. Rob Ford? Probably less so.
He looks like Chris Farley though!
