Rating: NNNNN
the event
PILLOW FIGHT Pillow Fight League tryout finals and number-one contender match. Friday (January 12), 9:30 pm. $15, adv $12. Mod Club Theatre, 722 College. 416-203-2389.
WHAT? “Real women, really fighting with pillows, in five-minute fights.”
FOAM OR FEATHER? “We’re only allowed foam.”
OCCUPATIONAL HAZARDS? “It hurts. I don’t try to hurt people, but some competitors get carried away. I’ve had a bruised kidney. Others have had a tooth go through a lip, or a dislocated shoulder.”
HOW DO YOU KNOW YOU’VE WON? “You can pin your opponent, like in wrestling, for a three count or just get them to submit. Whether you pin your opponent or put on a wrestling hold, the pillow must come between you and the person you’re fighting.”
WHAT’S YOUR SECRET WEAPON? “I do this one thing – it’s for performance purposes, and the audience loves it – where I turn my back to my opponent and hold her off while I spin the pillow around and then hit her.”
HAVE YOU EVER LOST? “Yeah, when I got the bruised kidney, and another time when the judge was biased. If a fight goes to five minutes, the judges decide. This one was fixed.”
DO YOU PRACTISE? “Three times a week. We do endurance stand-up fighting, swinging the pillows and ground play, where you learn submission strategies.”
ARE YOU PAID? “We get a performance fee and have connections with certain media. Rogers Mobile has photos and sound bites, and we have arrangements with beer.com, the Fight Network, Citytv.”
WHAT’S UP AFTER THIS FRIDAY’S CARD? “My title defence at the Galapagos Art Space in Brooklyn, New York. We’re scheduled for a taping with Good Morning America, there’s a possible spot on Letterman and interest from The Howard Stern Show. He’s a bit too much for me, but we have some real characters among the competitors – they’ll handle him.”
FAVOURITE PJs? “I only own cute pyjamas. My favourite is a little nightie with red polka dots. On the back, there’s a red triangle with red ruffles and a bow. Ohmygod, it’s so cute.”
