A rolled-up paper for PETA
Animal rights group PETA makes good points fighting fur, but you'd never know it from its "educational" campaigns. After ads demeaning women and offending with Holocaust references, PETA now shows fur-clad females drinking from toilets and crapping in litter boxes. This will make people forgo fur? Animals deserve rational advocates; too bad they've got PETA.
McGuinty plays Ontario hold 'em
When Ontario's lame Liberals should show some leadership, they crap out. The province won't expand casinos and gambling, but not because this lucrative cash grab is clearly shown to destroy the lives of many who engage in it. They're freezing expansion fearing the market is saturated and the "economic viability" of this bloodsucking bonanza might be jeopardized. No moral strength there - and they're still allowing new slots in Ajax and Belleville, economically depressed areas with plenty of desperate people looking for an easy way out of their troubles.
Stephen Harper's stronger stuff
Stephen Harper is making sure his party remains the socially intolerant Reform. His gay marriage-polygamy link tears a page from the lunatic theory that marijuana is evil because it leads to harder drugs. Harper thinks legalizing same-sex marriage will lead to stronger stuff: polygamy, mass Mormon conversion and mad outbreaks of three-way sex. If only PM Paul Martin would dump his free vote, he could skip fake election threats. He has the votes; make it so.
Praise the Lord - or else
Pathetic publishing penance in this month's Toronto Life begs for blustering Lord Folderol Conrad Black's forgiveness for causing him "pain." The glossy cosmetic surgery guide delivers a spectacular grovel: "Toronto Life did not intend to question Lord Black's observance of the Roman Catholic faith." He may be a good Catholic, but he's a shitty businessman whose once mighty but now collapsing empire is being wrested from him. He should spend more time on his books and less perusing shiny, shrinking mags.
Send in the hounds
It's somehow appropriate that legal bulldog Clayton Ruby would ride to the defence of Ontario's juggernaut-jawed pit bulls. The bow-wow-wow barrister is threatening legal action against Ontario's Liberal government if legislation is passed banning the malignant mutts. While he's long championed the underdog, it's hard to jump on the furniture with joy at Ruby's latest defence while victims and their families line up to detail vicious attacks by the dogs at government hearings prior to voting on the legislation.