“Canada’s highest honour has been debased. Henry Morgentaler has been awarded the Order of Canada. We are all diminished.”
– That’s right, Roman Catholic Archbishop Thomas Collins, your relevance has thankfully diminished now that the law lets women make up their own minds on abortion. And we proudly thank Morgentaler for that.
Over at Rogers’s Citytv, it looks like the employee fire sale has toasted Ed the Sock. The raspy-voiced hand puppet is extinct, along with his Ed & Red’s Night Party! program and annual Fromage music rundown on MuchMusic. This will no doubt have the 18-to-?54-year-old jock set punching holes through walls and drowning their sorrows in beer steins if the party doesn’t find a new home for its crass jokes and near-?naked babes on a new network come fall.
Life’s a beach
Longing for a little sand under your feet this summer? Well, pack your bags, because Greenpeace has just the place for you. Those kooky shit-disturbers have launched a hilarious new site (travellingalberta.com) urging tourists to visit Alberta’s “world famous pond-?side resort,” with lovely open-?pit paragliding, sailing on tailing ponds and “unique sour gas updrafts.” There are even photos of sunny blond kids building sandcastles out of bitumen. Hmm, maybe it’s time for a Discover Ontario campaign complete with rock climbers scaling coal stacks and cheery campers setting up tents in a boreal clear-?cut.
Let him stay
Tin-man Steven Harper seems poised to stonewall a motion passed by Parliament a whole month ago insisting war resisters remain in Canada. Corey Glass is first in line for the boot. The former National Guard sergeant from Fairmount, Indiana, worked at Camp Anaconda “sanitizing” civilian casualty reports. He’s been ordered to vacate Canada by July 10 or face deportation – a fate also awaiting eight other resisters – unless public opinion stops the feds in their tracks. Let Citizenship and Immigration Minister Diane Finley know that Canada wants peacemakers to make themselves at home. Send a message to email@example.com.
Tory chased out of town
So the sorry Tory is trying to find a place to park his ass, is he? Poor guy, we hear he’s begging members of his caucus to give up their seat for their fledgling leader. Twenty bucks says the man who ? would be mayor and was once determined to make the mauve of reddish-blue Tories chic with downtowners won’t get closer to the core than Aurora – if he’s lucky.