Aren't We Naughty, a chain of adult novelty stores, is offering couples the opportunity to fulfill their ultimate fantasy, sex in the clouds. For $695, "adventurous couples" will be flown out of the Oshawa Airport (now there's a hub of romance and passion) in a Cessna C310Q (is there, ahem, enough head room?) to view the T.O. skyline and Niagara Falls before being given an hour "to indulge in the ultimate erotic experience." Couples also receive a mile-high club certificate and gold-plated pin. Yeah, we're getting goosebumps just thinking about it.
kids not all right
T.O.'s institutions of higher learning, U of T, York and Ryerson, didn't fare too well in a recent survey completed by 21,000 students across Canada. Of the universities graded for, among other things, course quality and career preparation, U of T finished 24th, Ryerson 27th and York 29th out of 29. Ouch. Administrators at the aforementioned universities are reportedly chalking up their poor results to the fact that the survey was taken while their charges were nursing hangovers from frosh week festivities. Not likely.
hell on wheels
Best idea to come out of the debate around Toronto's Official Plan (from Environmental Defence Fund Canada): charge SUV owners more for parking in the city; charge a toll to cars entering the downtown during peak hours; and offer priority parking to people who car-pool or drive hybrid or natural gas vehicles. We suggest an additional tax for anyone silly enough to want to drive a fortress on wheels just to look cool.
Among the more heartless school funding cuts the Tories are enforcing are those occurring at Nelson Mandela Park Public School in the heart of Regent Park. The school, which was named after the South African civil rights leader in 2001 -- Mandela was present for the ceremony -- has been ordered to cut classroom assistants, lunchroom supervisor and three staff skilled in conflict resolution and behavioural issues. If only Nelson knew.
lie of the week
Premier Ernie Eves's suck-up to much-hated predecessor Mike Harris at the Tory convention on the weekend. It was an honour to have worked side by side with you, Michael, said the preem. You mean the same guy who's still causing the Tories no end of headaches for his muck-ups in office? And who hangs like the Grim Reaper over his party's re-election chances? Ernie, have you ever read Julius Caesar?