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Eves finds religion and abandons gays

Now, repeat after me: “I do,” er, “I don’t,” um, “what would Mike Harris do?” Ernie Eves is having a power outage in his brain regarding same-sex marriage. While a year ago open-minded Eves – hey, he lives in sin – said, “If two people decide they want to be in a union, why would I interfere with that?” Why indeed? But now the election-spooked premier wants to talk a little Tory tougher and speaks of “defending the rights of religious institutions and faiths” opposed to same-sex wedded bliss. Watch for more as the spineless Eves goes into full say-anything-to-win mode in his looming, desperate re-election bid.

“We do not provide equitable service to marginalized people.”

Ontario Provincial Police deputy commissioner Bill Currie tells the truth at the Canadian Association of Chiefs of Police conference while Toronto’s top gumshoe, Julian Fantino, steams in the first row.

Is Dudley Do-Right yella?

Based on new focus group findings, the RCMP is backing off on using yellow – though they’ll keep the stripe down their backs, er, pant legs. So would Dudley Do-Right be too wimpy now? Actually, we love the idea of wimpy cops. In much of small-town Canada, the horse-mounters are the law. If they spent more time arguing about swatches of fabric, choosing colours and musical riding and less time busting kids for drugs, that would be fine with us.

No “early morn” for Sean Paul

Canadian dancehall sensation Sean Paul might sing about gettin’ it on “till the early morn,” but not at his after-show party last Friday (August 22) at La Rouge nightclub. Partygoers paid a $10 premium to get into a club VIP area to meet and greet. But Sean Paul stayed parked in another Very, Very VIP room before splitting early, and many who forked over the extra cash never got near the new star. As usual, club management and the outside promoter blame each other. Meanwhile, the fans who made Sean Paul remain yet again on the wrong side of the velvet rope.

Sun’s Strobel scores scoop

Can’t imagine why the Sun dumped former editor Mike Strobel and stuck him with a regular column consolation prize. This week he shows his profound news sense by devoting two columns in a row – and counting – to the Toronto visit of dancer and financial adviser Marilyn Star. Canada’s own Star will be entertaining the troops all week at the House of Lancaster after being sprung from jail for her part in an, um, insider trading scandal involving two Wall Street bed buddies. Strobel spins stirring tales of the silver pole parolee’s return to society.

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