Seen Ellen postered around town? Yee-awn. For a fraction of the cost and way more laughs, you can check out hometown homo comedy act Oot and Aboot, otherwise known as Ted Morris, Richard Ryder and Susan Stewart (in alphabetical order, not gender, so don't get your boxer briefs in a knot). Individually, they're a riot; together with the B-Girlz, Roberto Bozac and Tim Sims Encouragement Fund Award nominee Linda Ellis, they're sure to pack out Yuk Yuk's Downtown with their special Valentine's Day-themed show. Sunday (February 9). See listings, page 86, for details.
What were some unsuccessful early names for Oot and Aboot? Will and Will and Grace; Lezzie and the Fags; and Honey, We're Homos.
If you, Richard Ryder and Susan Stewart, got into a fight, who would win? Me at Greco-Roman wrestling; Susan at foxy boxing; Richard in a purse fight.
Why should people sit in the front row when you're onstage? Closer to God.
Why shouldn't they? They'll be judged, harshly, and be found wanting.
How would you as a gay man redecorate Yuk Yuk's Downtown? Make-overs for the comics.
Early Oscar predictions? Matt Damon arrives in J.Lo drag, kills Ben Affleck, then J.Lo, then himself. Crowd goes wild. Best ratings ever.
Martha Stewart, innocent or guilty? The more important question is, male or female?
What movie should not get a "sing-along" screening? Boys Don't Cry.
You play hockey. What do you do when you're in the penalty box? Powder my nose and think about what I've done.
What are you doing Valentine's Day? Um, sorry, I'm busy. Thanks, though, Gary... I mean Glenn.