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Comedy Culture

Elvira Kurt

Rating: NNNNN

There are a handful of stand-ups I’d see any time, any day. Elvira Kurt, proudly known as the first stand-up to come out on national TV, is near the top of that list. The grinning comedian’s got great timing, has an ultra-likeable persona and isn’t afraid of making fun of her most painful experiences – including baring the complaints of her tsk-tsking Hungarian mom. Kurt’s all over the tube in her Adventures In Comedy series, but she delivers a rare live set this Friday (November 28) at Tallulah’s. See Comedy Listings, page 95, for details.

Why should people sit in the front row for your show?

To check out my new boob job.

Why shouldn’t they?

I could only afford to do one boob.

What did they find in Michael Jackson’s home?

A to-do list with “avoid getting caught” underlined twice.

Message for Paul Martin?

Just for fun, when Bush calls, insist you’ve always been PM and you have no idea who that “crazy French guy” was.

How are you preparing for winter?

I’m letting my pubes grow out. It’s cheaper than fleece – and warmer.

What part of you is Hungarian?

The part that wishes Tom Hanks had married a Hungarian lesbian so that my one-woman show could be turned into a hit movie.

If you, Ellen DeGeneres, Rosie O’Donnell and Lea DeLaria got into a wrestling ring, who would win?

Ellen would only do it if she could win. Rosie would sue if she lost. Lea would be screwing the female ref, and I’d be at the door insisting that I’m on the bill.

Who would watch?

My mother would call the next day to tell me that Lea DeLaria seems like a nice young man.

If there were an Elvira Kurt action figure, what would it do?

Avoid intimacy, then complain about being alone.

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