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From ‘U-Hauling’ to being a ‘Friend of Dorothy’ these terms are important to the queer community — Here’s why!

From ‘U-Hauling’ to being a ‘Friend of Dorothy’ these are some special terms that are important to the queer community. (Courtesy: Dev Banfield)

Throughout history, 2SLGBTQ+ communities have developed an extensive vocabulary of unique terminology. From new phrases to terms that have been used for decades, U-Hauling and being “in the family” have different meanings for queer people than what meets the eye. However, even if you are a “Friend of Dorothy,” it doesn’t mean you know what that means, or where the terms come from!

For example, U-Hauling. The term is attributed to a joke from queer comedian Lea DeLaria in the 1990s, poking fun at queer women for stereotypically falling in love and moving in together quickly. The question: What does a lesbian bring on a second date? The answer: A U-Haul.

Some of the less well-known terms were more prevalent in Western culture during a time when being queer was widely criminalized. However, these terms make up a crucial part of queer history, allowing our ancestors to communicate with and identify one another safely. Other more modern terms, like U-Hauling, are more descriptive of stereotypes and queer dynamics.

Dr. Craig Jennex is an associate professor of English at Toronto Metropolitan University, whose areas of research interest include queer participation in music and queer history in Canada. He explained that this phenomenon is common within communities facing oppression.

“I think for any sort of marginalized people, or marginalized community, one thing that we’re regularly having to search for is a sense of belonging, a sense of like, individual and collective agency,” Jennex said. 

READ MORE: ‘When we organize together, we win,’ Queer activists share their experiences during the Toronto bathhouse raids and remind us why we need Pride

“So one way marginalized communities, including queer and trans communities, do this is by trying to develop some sort of terminology or language that is unique and sort of underground and specific to the communities in which they exist.”

EXPLAINING THE IMPORTANCE OF SOME QUEER TERMINOLOGY

Jennex explained that being able to use culturally specific terms often allows people to bond over being members of a shared community. One of his favourite examples of this is when older queer men refer to themselves as “aunties” within the 2SLGBTQ+ community.

“I have a couple of older, gay, male, cis [-gender] mentors who are in their 70s and 80s, and sometimes they refer to themselves as my aunties, which I really love. Like, it’s such a beautiful term of endearment,” Jennex shared. “I think it also challenges the idea of a gender binary, which I think is really important.”

Another popular queer phrase? Friend of Dorothy. But where does this Wizard of Oz-themed reference originate?

“Pre-Stonewall, there’s this amazing history of [predominately] white, cis, gay men in urban spaces feeling close kinship with Judy Garland, who played Dorothy and the Wizard of Oz,” Jennex explained. 

“So that became a coded way of saying like ‘Is he a homo?’ Like, ‘Oh, is he a friend of Dorothy?’ that sort of thing,” the professor continued, adding that this kinship evolved due to Garland’s personal experiences. 

“Judy Garland was, for most of her life, portrayed as this ideal normal girl. And then in the 1950s, she has all of these public meltdowns, and then people start to realize she was pretending to be someone she’s not,” Jennex explained, adding that the kinship evolved as queer people knew exactly what it was like to be forced to pretend to be someone they’re not. 

“So I think that’s also a really beautiful example because there’s so much textual evidence in the archives of straight reviewers at Judy Garland performances writing in their newspapers, ‘There are so many crying homosexuals here. Like why are there so many? Like, why are these people so overwhelmed and overcome by joy in hearing Judy Garland perform? Where are all of these friends of Dorothy coming from?’.”

READ MORE: ‘Be loud and proud, and as bold as possible’: What queer people would tell their younger selves

Jennex shared that before the Stonewall movement of 1969, people used the term “musical” as a code word for homosexuality. 

“So if they wanted to know if somebody was gay, they’d be like, ‘Oh, is he musical?’ and I just love that idea. Like the association of musicality with homosexuality, I think is really cool.”

As per the University of North Carolina, simply asking if someone is “in the family” or just “family” is another historically popular, yet coded, way of asking about someone’s sexual or gender identity.

Jennex also explained that in the United Kingdom, queer communities used a unique language called Polari to communicate. Lancaster University reports that the language was mainly used by queer men, although other members of the 2SLBGTQ+ community, as well as theatre performers and sex workers. Additionally, many members of this community also taught it to friends.

QUEER IN TORONTO

The TMU professor even shared some queer terms that are specific to 2SLGBTQ+ communities in Toronto. 

“I’ve heard people refer to Hanlan’s Homos before [as in] people who spend all sorts of time at Hanlan’s Beach,” Jennex explained, in referring to the Toronto Island beach that has long served as a safe haven for queer Torontonians. 

“Or ‘Meet me under the clock,’ was used in the 60s, mostly because that was the slogan for the St. Charles Tavern,” Jennex explained, adding that the bar, which was located on Yonge St., was one of few safe locations for queer people to hang out during the period.

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