SALT (Phillip Noyce). 100 minutes. Opens Friday (July 23). For venues, trailers, and times, see Movies. Rating: NN
Puh-lease – if you’re gonna make an actioner with Angelina Jolie that isn’t sexy or funny, can you at least make it smart? Unlike Jolie’s other bang-up pics, like Wanted and the Lara Croft series, Salt is unremittingly grim. The only thing amusing about it is the number of holes in the plot. A presidential bunker that you can shoot your way through with an M16? I don’t think so.
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Jolie plays CIA agent Evelyn Salt, accused of being a sleeper spy by a Russian defector. Seems the Soviets groomed a Boys From Brazil-type team of young children to serve the Reds, and Salt is alleged to be among the most gifted.
No sooner does he name her than Salt, claiming innocence, escapes the intelligence fortress and starts blowing things up – love the homemade bazooka – with head security guy Chiwetel Ejiofor in full pursuit. Liev Shreiber, as Salt’s long-time colleague, is sure she’s been framed, but he stands alone.
The movie has zero texture. It unfolds in a monotonous series of explosions and car chases, and the early escape sequence takes up almost a third of the movie, during which Salt emerges from multiple car crashes without a scratch. Halfway through, you realize there’s been almost no plot development. Jolie’s relationship with her know-nothing husband (August Diehl) is so underplayed, there’s nothing to connect to emotionally. The whole thing hinges on the “Is she or isn’t she?” issue, which is wafer-thin.
Jolie looks terrific, and there’s nothing like a hunky woman kicking ass, even if she might be the enemy – but her acting chops are wasted here.
If you’re an action fan, it’ll fill your basic needs. But if you’re hoping Jolie will wink at the camera, forget about it.
