Rating: NNNNN
The Wurst
LOBBY (192 Bloor West, at Avenue Road, 416-929-7169) If the velvet rope out front isn’t enough to turn you off, the champagne ‘n’ charlie crowd inside chowing down on inept grub like foie-gras-topped macaroni will surely do the trick. Somewhere, P.T. Barnum laughs in his grave.
CAPTAIN JOHN’S (1 Queens Quay West, at Yonge, 416-363-6062) In
my constant quest to go where no restaurant critic
has gone before, I ventured into this quaint, nautically
themed tourist trap expecting the worst. And got
it – musty frozen seafood prepared by a kitchen staff who appear to be indentured to the ship’s galley, all the while watched over by servers so uninterested in customers that they read books. It’s a wonder the barely live lobsters in the joint’s murky tanks don’t make a break for the lake.
LICHEE GARDEN (480 University, at Dundas West, 416-322-8898) For
every Susur there are a thousand Lichee Gardens.
Chinese cuisine at this MSG-saturated mausoleum time-locked
in the 50s means sweet ‘n’ sour bo-bo balls with
fried rice, egg roll and fortune cookie. Beautiful
room, expensive, dreadful food.
ANGELINI’S (504 Jarvis, at Cawthra Square, 416-922-5811) After
living downtown for over 30 years, I have never seen
a single soul enter or exit this once-grandiose Victorian.
Now that I’ve dined there, I know why. For culinary
anthropologists only.
OLIVIA’S (53 Clinton, at College, 416-533-3989) I
was unable to fathom my own dislike for this gloomy
boïte until, while trying to find the basement loo, I stumbled into a laundry room and found behind a curtain a quintuple platinum CD of Alannah Myles’s greatest hits. Think Dorian Gray and his portrait in the attic.
The 2003 Toronto restaurant scene was all about names — a celebrity chef’s triumphant return, an exciting crew of upstart cooks just beginning to make their mark, and an anonymous Harbord address that doesn’t even bother with the formality. And although superficial supper clubs grabbed the mainstream media’s attention, NOW ventured far from the eaten path.
1 CLAFOUTI (915 Queen West, at Strachan, 416-603-1935) The
popularity of this postcard-perfect Parisian patisserie
is proven every morning by the lineups waiting for
owners’ Boris Dosne’s and brother Olivier Jensen-Reynaud’s
awesome still-warm-from-the-oven croissants. Add
swoonsome sandwiches, chic salads and the house’s
namesake ethereal berry tarts and it’s no riddle
why this tiny storefront is always swamped.
2 LIVE (258 Dupont, at Spadina, 416-515-2002) Live’s
effervescent self-taught chef, Jennifer Italiano,
insists on doing it raw. Everything she creates – vegan pizzas, napoleon-like lasagna, drool-worthy desserts – is made entirely from uncooked seeds, nuts and sprouts. Sounds flaky until the first intensified flavours explode on the tongue. Eating healthy has never tasted this good. Watch for a move downtown to a facility bigger than the current four-seat space next spring.
3 JAMIE KENNEDY WINE BAR (9 Church, at Front, 416-362-5586) Rumours
of the stellar chef’s retirement after the closing
of JK ROM last spring were greatly exaggerated. He’s
back – “But I never went away!” – at this ultra-hot bistro that cleverly combines tapas-style bistro fare with small-pour wine sampling. Though its casual lunch-counter set-up makes the perfect setting for a quick lunch, a detailed dinner or a bite after the show, just try snagging a no-reserve table at feeding-frenzy prime time.
4 CHIPPY’S (893 Queen West, at Gore Vale, 416-866-7474) Poor
Bellwoods. First, quiet Clafouti opens in the nabe
and turns into a zoo, then Chippy’s a few doors down – Toronto’s first upmarket fish ‘n’ chips shop – follows shortly afterwards and becomes another instant mob scene. The reason? Fresh, daily-delivered fish, twice-cooked hand-cut fries and marvellous mushy peas with curried gravy. And as predicted here, Chippy’s is soon to expand to Vancouver and Montreal.
5 EDWARD LEVESQUE’s KITCHEN (1290 Queen East, at Hastings, 416-465-3600) They
don’t come any quirkier than this offbeat east-side
eatery: first-rate spoon-style breakfasts and lunches
all day, an often dazzling dinner card that takes
comfort food to new heights and a bustling brunch
that can include the Rosedale set, artsy types and
all-girl hockey teams. If only they were all this
good.
6 EL JACALITO (1500 Royal York, at Lawrence, 416-244-4447) Deep
in Etobicoke, this subterranean Mexican cantina throws
the wildest party in town every Saturday night. First,
chef Luz Adriana Romero whips up an authentic way-south-of-the-border
spread, then she leads a dance troupe and mariachi
band through a spectacularly entertaining floor show.
The only cheese here is on the enchiladas.
7 EAT (1321 Dundas West, at Dovercourt, 416-537-3000) If
this lovely west-side café can be faulted, it’s because it’s too damned ambitious. Lesser spots should be so lucky. Industrious first-time restaurateur and chef Anila Dhanji admits she’s still finding her feet, but her astounding minimally topped ultra-thin-crust pizza rivals Marcello’s and Terroni’s as Toronto’s best pie. And at seven bucks a pop, only a fool would carp.
8 OMI (451 Church, at Maitland, 416-920-8991) I
have never understood Toronto’s mania for sushi,
especially since we’re hundreds of miles from the
nearest salt water. But this comfortable-as-an-old-sweater
boïte warrants the obsession. Witness excellent seafood, the expert knife-wielding of chef John Lee and a soundtrack of vintage 50s jazz and soulful pop.
9 93 HARBORD (93 Harbord, at Robert, 416-922-5914) The
restaurant with no name, this charming, upscale
Middle Eastern eatery teams chef Isam Kaisi’s contemporary
spin on a classic cuisine with partner Charlotte
Dowd’s smooth professionalism out front. Watch
for
lunch and brunch in the new year.
10 NIAGARA STREET CAFÉ (169 Niagara, at Wellington West, 416-703-4222) Niagara
has the recipe for restaurant success. The savvy
kitchen creates a mostly organic menu based on
local produce, then serves it unpretentiously
in a retro-decorated
space in a far-from-fashionable neighbourhood
to a wide-ranging clientele that arrives on rides
ranging from BMWs to bikes. Simple, really.
