Hello, readers, and happy Masturbation Month.
Though it may seem a little gimmicky, the San Francisco-based sex shop Good Vibrations actually invented this month-long celebration in 1995 in response to the firing of Surgeon General Joycelyn Elders. In 1994 at a United Nations conference on AIDS, Elders was asked if she thought promoting masturbation might be an effective way to prevent young people from engaging in risky sexual activity.
Elders, who for years had been deeply engaged in campaigning for sex education at all levels of schooling, replied, “I think that it is part of human sexuality, and perhaps it should be taught.”
She was relieved of her post one week later for “values contrary to the administration.” That would be the Clinton administration, whose leader’s own values vis à vis appropriate sexual conduct came into question throughout his career.
I hope that this month, while our part of the world is bursting with new life and possibility (I was up at York U this week and saw baby geese stumbling around on the grounds, dying from the cuteness), you’ll take some extra-special time to indulge in self-loving and experiment with techniques that honour your unique anatomy.
If you have negative feelings about masturbation, be they driven by religious commitments or social stigma, maybe now would be the time to gently reflect on these things and the impact they have on your self-image and your attitude to other peoples’ choices.
Consider opening up to the idea that if masturbation isn’t right for you, that doesn’t mean it shouldn’t be an enjoyable and enlightening option for others. Maybe you’ve been feeling a little run down and far away from your sexuality, or maybe you’ve been on some meds that make orgasm elusive in any sexual situation and this is frustrating. Wherever you may be, feel free to share your thoughts on masturbation in the comment section below.
In the meantime, and speaking of anatomy…
Dear Sasha,
My Twitter feed has been buzzing lately with news that the G spot has, at long last, been located – like, actually excised from a corpse.
Though I’ve never actually seen mine, it is something I knew I had all along, having been a mad ejaculator since I started getting myself off at around age five.
Sure, at first I thought it was pee (well, for at least another 10 years anyway), but was then informed, by a boy no less, of its true nature. I must say I’m confused. How is it that I have had wonderful experiences with this part of my anatomy and yet there seems to be endless debate about its actual existence?
Gee Whizz
Dear Gee,
Yes, at long last we have actual proof that the G spot does exist, and according to the evidence garnered from one lone test subject, it is revolting: a horrid little bluish grape thingy. I have been poring over a print-out of the article detailing the discovery, which also includes photographs of the excised organ. Trust me, the images of it are worse than you can imagine. I’m five minutes away from making an appointment to have mine removed, I’m so grossed out.
That is, if I actually have one. See, this news was published by The Journal Of Sexual Medicine, a magazine that only in January published an article on the non-existence of this hallowed piece of female real estate.
It was also “discovered” by Adam Ostrzenski who is well known in his field – that field being cosmetic gynecology. If you don’t know anything about cosmetic gynecology, here is the description from Ostrzenski’s website:
“Cosmetic gynecology is the recent breakthrough in the aesthetic field that transforms female external genitalia appearance to look young-er and more natural. Cosmetic gynecological procedures reconstruct existing defects from giving birth, and help improve self-confidence and acceptance from others.
“Childbearing trauma, aging and inherited irregularities affect not only the aesthetic look of the external female organs, but also create the feeling of being different or inadequate. It can have an effect on inti-mate relationship and women’s emotions.”
Some thoughtful critiques about this “discovery” have been made by the usual suspects – namely Cory Silverberg and Petra Boynton, the latter of whom makes this point: “Alongside the numerous cosmetic genital procedures he offers, Dr. Ostrzenski trains practitioners in procedures including ‘g-spot fat augmentation’ and ‘g-spot surgical aug-men-tation’. This sounds very much like something that could well be considered a conflict of interest and should have been declared as such in the paper.”
Others are also skeptical of Ostr-zenski’s finding. As Tina Hesman Saey reported in Science News: “Beverly Whipple, one of the researchers who gave the G-spot its moniker in 1982, isn’t so sure that what Ostrzenski found is the G-spot. ‘I have no idea what this thing is that he found,’ says Whipple, a sex researcher and professor emerita at Rut-gers University. ‘We don’t even know if this tissue is normal.'”
Again, Gee, this study was conducted on one woman. What if this structure was something unique to her physiology? Also, wouldn’t Ostrzenski have discovered the G spot prior to this autopsy during the surgeries he offers to augment it?
“Although Ostrzenski calls the structure erectile tissue, he performed no other analysis to show that the tissue really does what he claims,” writes Hesman Saey. “He also presented no evidence that nerves run to or from the structure to carry stimulatory signals. Whipple and others doubt that the G spot is one structure.
“‘We never said it was a distinct anatomical entity,'” she says. Instead, many different structures stimulated by different types of nerves converge in the area. “‘It’s a region that is highly sensitive… a zone of great erotic complexity.'”
Personally, these debates remind me of those centred around Atlantis, a mythological island that is also a keyword for any advanced civilization lost to hubris.
As Boynton wrote, “Another approach might be to consider how this scenario would look if it were penises under the microscope. While there are undoubtedly distressing issues facing men around penis size and stamina, the stereotype for men is that they all experience pleasure from their dicks.
“If you talk to men, you discover some get intense pleasure from testicle stimulation and are unable to orgasm without this. Some hate their balls touched. Some get a lot of pleasure if attention is paid to the shaft of the penis. Some find direct stimulation to the glans uncomfortable. Others experience more pleasure from anal stimulation.
“Yet we do not suggest because men can and do experience pleasure from different areas in their genitals that there are specific spots that guarantee male orgasm or that men are somehow deficient if they do not experience, say, a left testicle orgasm. We don’t scan, survey or perform autopsies on penises to establish the most sensitive parts. Nor do we have self-help books, courses or sex toys designed to coach men into experiencing orgasm through stimulation to specific areas of their genitals.”
You seem to have a good handle on things without the medical peanut gallery trumpeting new discoveries every couple of months or so, Gee. My guess is that the little region inside you that provides you with so much pleasure and laundry isn’t too concerned about all the hype either.
Got a question? Ask Sasha: sasha@nowtoronto.com
