3TARDS at the Horseshoe (370 Queen West), Saturday (May 7), doors 9 pm. $8-$10. HS, RT, SS. See listing.
The 3tards have been described as Canada's most politically incorrect punk band. Their shows have featured live births, circumcisions and a mock gay wedding between 3tards vocalist John "John Tard" Romanelli and bassist Andrew "Fox Tard" Fox.
Formed in 2001 and dissolved in 2009, the Brampton group promise nothing less than insanity at their reunion concert at the Horseshoe.
"This show will be the most elaborate one we've ever done," says Roma-nelli from an Arby's in Scarborough. "To be honest, I'm a little worried about it because it's so fucking over-the-top."
The 3tards - whose current lineup also includes guitarist Eric "Le Tard" Carr, drummer Mark "Pez Tard" Pezzelato and guitarist Devin "Dee Tard" Fox - rose to prominence in the early 00s by following in the footsteps of Toronto's Bunchofuckingoofs, playing Kensington Market hot spots like Planet Kensington. They put out three full-length albums, including 2009's 333: Halfway To Hell (Spinerazor). So can we expect more?
"We've been practising for this show for the last six months," says Romanelli. "We're going to perform and then make the decision whether or not to write and record another album."
Despite a decade's worth of outrageousness, the 3tards have also raised over $10,000 for breast cancer awareness in the process. Unfortunately, their last fundraiser, a 2009 gig in Oshawa, didn't turn out so well.
"The cops shut us down about four songs in, citing noise complaints," says Romanelli, still heated. "They could've stepped back and let us finish our set. Everyone was waiting in the rain.
"Basically, fuck the cops in Oshawa. I would love to do something there again just to raise the money we didn't get a chance to."