Advertisement

Lifestyle

A year of living man-free

My name is Claire Brosseau. I’m a stand-up comedian, an actress, and a waitress. I’ve achieved a level of success to be proud of, but a combination of luck and laziness, have rendered my 33rd year to be somewhat disappointing.

I thought I’d be done waiting tables at this age. I thought I might be married. I was hoping to have a child. On the other hand, I have very little responsibility, can sleep all day, travel (at any given moment), party, and pretty much do anything I feel like.

It can be pretty great.

Some of you may find my lifestyle caliginous. Know this: I have amazing friends, I do exactly what I love for work and for play, am close to my family (geographically and emotionally), live in a cute little apartment with the most awesome cat. Do I sound defensive? I guess that’s what I’m trying to figure out.

I’ve made a few questionable decisions in the past few years. Mostly when it comes to men. I’ve been lucky – I’ve had a lot of love in my life. When I look back at my roster, I’ve been with some wonderful men who changed my life by opening my eyes to art, conceptions, sports, and politics. Some of them have become good friends of mine, some I work with, some have achieved fame and success and I admire them from afar. Some have sort of faded away – out of my life like looking down at the earth while your plane charges the clouds.

So starting Tuesday, May 18th 2010, I began on a yearlong man-cleanse. No men (or women – I’ve been known to get a little gay after too many cocktails…) for a year.

That means birthday alone, Christmas alone, NEW YEAR’S EVE alone. It doesn’t matter if it’s a one-night stand or the love of my life. These will be the rules.

  • NO SEX
  • NO KISSING
  • NO FLIRTY TEXTS, EMAILS, & CONVERSATIONS OF ANY KIND.
  • NO DATES (INCLUDING LUNCH & COFFEE)
  • NO HANDHOLDING
  • NO PICTURES
  • NO SUGGESTIVE STATUS UPDATES/TWEETS
  • NO LOOKING AT *DUDES’ WEBSITE, FACEBOOK/TWITTER PAGE MORE THAT 1X/24HRS
  • NO INVITING *BOYS TO MY SHOWS, OR GOING TO THEIRS
  • NO MAKING ANY DECISIONS BASED ON *DUDES INCL. GIGS, OUTINGS, NUMBER OF DRINKS CONSUMED ONCE REALIZED SAID *BOYS ARE IN SAME LOCATION.

*Men/man-boy-child of particular interest.

This project scares me. A year is a long time to feel lonely.

One of my goals, I suppose, is to embrace loneliness. It’s an important lesson for everyone, but as an actor who often shoots on location, and a female comic who tours, I do spend an enormous amount of time alone. It’s probably for the best that I learn how to deal with this healthily, sooner than later.

I also really want to have a baby (at least one) and giving up on meeting a perspective baby-daddy at 33 years old seems like a long time. The hope is that it won’t just be year wasted on heartbreak and disappointment. Again, important life lessons to matriculate, but I’ve had enough of it for a while. I’ve cheated, been cheated on, lied to, used, and slighted. I’ve also had a lot of tenderness, laughs, and pleasure. If I want to have a husband/partner and a family, at some point hopefully, I’ll have serious responsibilities to the people who depend on me as a wife and mother.

Now is the only time where I could take a year to focus only on myself. It would only get more complicated as I get older. It really frightens me. And in my life so far, I’ve found it crucial to face what terrifies me.

Follow my year-long sabbatical from men here.

Advertisement

Exclusive content and events straight to your inbox

Subscribe to our Newsletter

This field is for validation purposes and should be left unchanged.

By signing up, I agree to receive emails from Now Toronto and to the Privacy Policy and Terms & Conditions.

Recently Posted