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Fat chicks are hot (and plentiful!), but lots of retailers and designers don’t seem to know that. They peddle all their wares to fashion sticks and leave the chubbalicious with the muumuus and the sweats. Where, oh where, can the funky fatty shop? We asked Allyson Mitchell (1) and Joanne Huffa (2), two hot mamas from performance/activist troupe Pretty, Porky & Pissed Off — who say, “Two thumbs down to stores where the only thing we can fit into are barrettes and shoes!” — to take us shopping. This is what we found….
1. “Lunch party, anyone?” (floral dress from Voluptuous, Fairview Mall, 416-494-3545, $85 shoes from Value Village, 924 Queen East, 416-778-4818, and others, $5.95 arm bands and purse from Lilith, 541 Queen West, 416-504-5353, $65 scarf from Stella Luna, 1627 Queen West, 416-536-7300, $5.95).
2. When the glamour bitch takes T.O., she dresses like this (dress from Voluptuous, $75 scarf from Lilith, $30 and shoes from Stella Luna, $16).
3. “Would you like to summer at my cottage in the Hamptons? Yes, everyone does…” (dress from Voluptuous, $105 shoes and glasses from Stella Luna, $14 each).
4. Sporto chick. “Wanna play ball?” (sweat skirt from Voluptuous, $120 socks from Lilith, $8 shoes, $2.99, and terry T, $3.99, from Value Village).
5. Tough girl next door. “Borrow my chainsaw, will ya?” (shirt and shoes from Value Village, each $2.99 Kiss wrist band, Dollarama, 1337 Queen West, 416-531-4809, and others, $1 stretch denim jeans, Addition-Elle, Eaton Centre, 416-596-1030, and others, $99.99 socks from Lilith, $8).
6. “Ooops, is that my ass sticking out perkily? So sorry!” (dress from Voluptuous, $80 shoes from Transit, Eaton Centre, 416-537-0439, $50 choker from Stella Luna, $16).
7. “Take me home to Mom. I’m nice. I bake” (sweater from Stella Luna, $20 pants from Voluptuous, $70 scarf from Lilith, $25 and shoes from Value Village, $3.99).
8. Rocker hosebag. “Ozzzeeeeee!!!!!!” (shirt from Cotton Ginny, Eaton Centre, 416-599-2139, and others, $60 belt from Value Village, $2.99 and jeans from Addition-Elle, $99).
Pretty, Porky & Pissed Off will be whooping it up in their very own cabaret at Buddies in Bad Times Theatre (12 Alexander) on Friday (November 8), 10 pm. $3. 416-975-8555. Also check out Good for Her’s (175 Harbord) Sexy Is Not A Size! workshop, featuring lingerie, fetish clothes and fashion alternatives on December 13 at 7 pm. $25. 416-588-0900.
Stylist: Stephanie Wierzbicki Marshall
