What to know
- Your first-date food order can reveal confidence, openness, or even red flags—like ordering the priciest dish.
- How you treat servers, react to surprises, and share food matters as much as what you eat.
- Being mindful of price and communicating about expectations shows class and respect; splurging or penny-pinching can leave the wrong impression.
- Small gestures, like saying please and thank you, or matching your date’s energy, are just as telling as what’s on your plate.
What’s your first date red flag? Toronto daters spill how an expensive food order, or how they treat the waiter, can reveal someone’s entire personality.
For the first episode of Subway Takes Toronto, the online show where guests spill their hottest takes while riding the TTC, local content creator @thea.rain4d chatted with host Kareem Rahma about how someone’s order can put their whole personality on display during a first date.
For her, a man ordering steak is showing off and giving “small d*ck energy,” while a burger can sometimes be disgusting depending on how you eat it — or a hint to their talent in bed.
So, for this edition of This is Dating Now, we asked Torontonians what they look out for on a first date and whether someone’s food order can reveal their personality.
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‘Trying new restaurants is like a love language of mine’: These foodies agree a food order tells a lot about someone
Toronto dater Michelle M. jokingly said she hopes her orders show she’s a foodie and that she’s looking for someone who shares her passion for food.
“I like apps. I like to share, and trying new restaurants is like a love language of mine,” she told Now Toronto. “Even if it’s not a fancy restaurant… it’s my favourite thing. I just love sharing these kinds of experiences together.”
However, Toronto dater Megan B., admitted that someone’s order reveals how healthy someone is—a trait she loves in a man.
“If they order something healthy, maybe it means they do sports a lot, and I like that,” she said.
For those wondering how to spot the signs of a good date, Laura Bilotta, founder of matchmaking company Single in the City, said you need to pay attention to how someone makes their choices. Here are the signs she said to look out for:
- Are they comfortable ordering what they want?
- Are they obsessing over the price?
- Are they judging what you’re eating?
- Do they comment on your weight or what you’re consuming?
If you wish to eat a salad, then do it. But don’t let a man order it for you.
But she adds to still have dating etiquette, so if you order a burger, feel comfortable doing so, but try not to be too messy.
With garlic, though, be mindful of your breath. If you’re both having it, that’s fine. But if you’re planning to share a kiss, Bilotta joked that that’s a different story.
‘Price awareness’: Should you be looking at the menu prices if your date’s paying?
Toronto resident John B. says he appreciates someone who shows “price awareness” when ordering.
“A red flag would be if they bought the most expensive thing on the menu on a first date,” John told Now Toronto.
Bilotta says it’s important for a date to be considerate or mindful of their spending. Daters don’t need to get the cheapest thing on the menu, but they also shouldn’t splurge on a $100 steak and the most expensive bottle of wine.
“It’s about their level of awareness. It’s not necessarily about the money; it’s about you being mindful that the other person is picking up the bill,” she said, adding that overspending can reveal you’re an “opportunist” or “selfish.”
“It’s called basic class and etiquette. Read the room, be reasonable,” Bilotta told Now Toronto.
Though she said it’s important to communicate what you’re doing on the date: dinner, drinks, appetizers?
‘You don’t want foot-in-the-mouth disease’: How much should you drink?
But John says someone’s drink order says just as much about them, explaining that he appreciates getting drinks on a date, but his date shouldn’t “go absolutely crazy” with alcohol.
Bilotta says drinking responsibly is key if you’re driving, and to avoid embarrassing yourself.
“I just think it’s unattractive when it gets to a point where you’re drinking a lot more than you probably should be on a first date. You don’t want foot-in-the-mouth disease, where you start saying things you probably shouldn’t be saying,” she said.
“Plus, your inhibitions get loose, and I just feel like you need to keep your composure on a first date.”
‘I want them to feel appreciated’: This Toronto dater says what someone orders doesn’t matter to him
Unlike John, Toronto dater Duy V. says he wouldn’t judge someone for their order—or its price—at least not consciously.
“I think unconsciously I would judge, but not in a way that would depreciate their value… I appreciate, and I respect them for whatever they order… if they choose to have nice things for themselves, it’s good,” he told Now Toronto.
Duy says he will pay — no matter the price — especially if he invited someone on a date.
“I like to pay because I like to offer kindness and offer my intention. If it’s a date with someone I’m interested in, I’ve already invested to an extent that I want them to feel appreciated,” he explained.
Being nice to waiters, energy and chivalry: What Torontonians are looking for instead
Michelle’s main priority: if they will share appetizers with her. But after the foodie gets her stomach full, these are her requirements:
- How her date treats the waiters: are they saying please and thank you?
- If they run out of an item they wanted, how do they react? Do they go with the flow?
For Megan, chivalry is most important.
“If they do little things like pull out your chair,” she said.
But Duy cares most about someone’s energy.
“I will pay attention to how they feel and try to match my energy with them. I think the goal is just to have a good time and enjoy each other’s company. And I think the matching criteria will come as we talk, as we have conversation, as we go about the date,” he told Now Toronto.
Bilotta said that to know your compatibility, these are the signs to look out for:
- Do we like each other?
- Are there commonalities?
- Do I like your energy?
- Do I think you’re cute?
- Do I think you’re funny?
- Are they polite?
- Do they say “please” and “thank you”?
- Do they act like the staff is beneath them?
- Do they respect your boundaries?
