Gay bars, clubs, and raves are all important pieces of queer culture. From places to meet other members of the 2SLGBTQ+ community, to a safe haven from homophobia and other forms of discrimination, these places provide more than a place to grab a drink. For some, they’re a lifeline. It’s important to recognize the ways that these spaces have stood as pillars of the community, from the beginnings of the Pride movement at New York City’s Stonewall Inn to the bathhouse raids that rocked Toronto from the 1970s to early 2000s, queer bars have been the scene of some of our community’s most historic moments.
But what about those of us who don’t drink alcohol? For a variety of reasons, many queer people choose not to drink. Outside of conditions such as alcohol use disorder, there are other reasons people choose not to drink or participate in activities that include alcohol. Some faiths prohibit drinking, and others still choose not to drink due to their medical conditions, this author included. And some people just don’t like drinking!
Many people we’ve spoken to for past editions of Queer & Now have voiced the opinion (concern?) that there are not enough alcohol-free spaces dedicated to queer people. However, our research found that’s not necessarily true. In fact, I am of the opinion that Toronto is a hidden gem when it comes to 2SLGBTQ+ soirees that are not centred around drinking – if not completely alcohol-free. We attended several throughout August to find out what else is happening, and where else queer people in the GTA can find community, minus booze.
WE’RE QUEER AND WE’RE HERE (AND WE DON’T WANT ANY BEER!)
The Toronto Queer Market brings together dozens of vendors every month for an event at Barbara Hall Park, located next to The 519 community centre on Church Street. It features free drag performances, as well as food and beverages for sale, making it the perfect way to shop local (and queer!) and hang out with other 2SLGBTQ+ folks! In the winter months, the markets are held inside the community centre.
Beyond the Bow is a Toronto-based organization that curates events for the queer community, with a focus on creating spaces that are more inclusive of those who don’t drink. The organization holds events including (but not limited to!) boxing classes, speed dating, and movie nights.
Kat is one of the founding members of Beyond the Bow. She shared that they organize events with the hope of providing spaces for queer people to connect with their community without feeling the pressure to drink or participate in partying culture.
“Alcohol is a big focus in a lot of queer spaces. Unfortunately, that’s just the nature [of things]. Our community found spaces in underground bars, and that type of scene,” she explained, adding that these were some of the only places that gay and trans people have historically been able to freely express themselves.
“But I think it’s important to show that we can branch out and ‘queer-up’ other spaces that are not necessarily queer, and we don’t need alcohol to do that.”
Beyond the Bow has a hand in organizing Pride Picnic events. However, there are other organizers involved in Pride Picnic, including Shannon Burns. She told Queer & Now that the picnic collective held several different events for 2SLGBTQ+ people and their families, including beach days.
“So many queer events are focused around alcohol and that seems to be kind of a common theme. So, what was important to us was to create a space that wasn’t surrounded by alcohol, because not everyone drinks,” Burns explained.
“I think it’s a lot safer of a space, and we can do things during the day which isn’t always as common either. And it opens up the possibility for there to be kids and animals,” she continued, adding that they often see many people bring their pets and babies to their events.
For those who are more… coffee-driven, Queer Coffee Toronto may be the group for you.
“Having a coffee meetup situation kind of bases it in like a non-alcoholic space, which is cool, but also very different from what we usually see with queer-focused events,” shared organizer Lynn.
The meetup organizer also shared that over the past few months, she has noticed several different Instagram pages that are dedicated to creating other gatherings for the community. She said it’s refreshing to see 2SLGBTQ+ gatherings that are not necessarily “traditional” events, like bar crawls and drag shows.
“We have the Queer Sober Social, we have my coffee group, we have the foodies group, and some of these are not specifically sober, but the focus is not alcohol and drinking specifically.”
She explained that during their coffee meetups, sober attendees have approached her to share that having an event that isn’t “alcohol-based” makes them feel more included in the community. Many people who choose not to drink have shared that they do not feel comfortable going to queer bars or clubs, which is often the only place to find 2SLGBTQ+ groups in the same setting.
Studies have found that queer people are more likely to suffer from alcoholism. The National Survey on Drug Use and Health found that in 2020 around 22 per cent of lesbian, gay, and bisexual adults lived with an alcohol use disorder in the United States, compared to 11 per cent of the entire population. These stats prove how important it is for queer people to have community spaces where they are not expected to drink.
“It’s not really an option for a lot of sober people just to say, you know, ‘I’ll tolerate it.’ Part of their recovery, and part of managing it, is sort of that removal and distance from alcohol,” Lynn said.
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