Is Valentine’s Day a scam? Toronto singles share

Are singles in the city bitter this Valentine’s season, or secretly rooting for romance?

Every Feb. 14, singles get a reminder that they don’t have romantic love, but they also don’t need to spend so much money on Valentine’s Day. For those in the heart of Toronto’s dating scene, the day brings mixed feelings: some happily avoid paying for a pricey dinner, while others feel disappointed by the lack of romantic connection. These varied experiences set the stage for how Torontonians view Valentine’s Day.

For this edition of This Is Dating Now, Now Toronto asked singles at a dating event whether they think Valentine’s Day is a scam.

Rae, a Toronto resident, calls Valentine’s Day a scam. 

“Like all capitalistic holidays—Christmas, Halloween—it’s designed to get my money,” he joked. “At least I’ll meet some girls this time.”

He says while you can “put yourself out there,” maintaining the connection is difficult in Toronto.

For short-term connections, he rates Toronto’s scene eight or nine out of ten. But for long-term? “We are in the trenches—that’s a four or three. It’s bad out there,” he said.

Another Toronto single, Neha, agrees with Rae’s point. In fact, she rates Toronto’s dating scene a zero out of ten. 

“You do get a lot of chances to meet new people, but it doesn’t turn into long-term, so you’re always back in the [dating] pool.” 

We can understand it’s hard for anyone to even judge whether Valentine’s Day is a scam if they can’t experience the day because of the city’s dating life.

Toronto resident RJ shares he’d rather “go out with the boys” and do “nothing romantic related” because Valentine’s Day is a “money grab.” He rejects the whole concept of Valentine’s Day. “I feel like if you love somebody, you should love them 365 [days,] and not one day when people tell you you should love somebody,” he said.

He also opts out of hookup culture, describing Toronto’s dating scene as “broken,” which is why he’s spending the day away from anything romantic.

But GTA resident Akash disagrees. 

“We do need a day to celebrate love, a date on the calendar,” he said. 

Even though his experience dating in the GTA has been bad, he thinks it can be saved by bringing back the “old-school way of dating.” Akash explains that dating apps have “ruined everything,” and that they’re at the core of why modern dating is “f*cked up.” So he shares that he goes to in-real-life events, encouraging Torontonians to “get your lazy a** out of the house and meet new people instead of vibing over texts and dating apps.”

Another Toronto single, Livy, also weighs in, agreeing that Toronto’s dating scene is pretty messed up, wishing she could rate it on a decimal scale if there were “something lower than zero.” 

“If you go to an actual bar… I think guys have a hard time they’ll find uncomfortable walking up to a woman because they’ll feel like a creep, and then online dating is sh*t,” Livy said.

Despite frustrations with the dating scene, Livy maintains she doesn’t see Valentine’s Day as a scam. “If you have someone you’re in a relationship with, it’s lovely,” she said. Still, she urges Torontonians to consider the value placed on the day. 

“If you’re with someone and feel they need to do something big for [Valentine’s Day], you might want to question if just being together isn’t enough.”

That’s why she plans on doing laundry that day.

Toronto single Harish offers a different, more controversial take on Valentine’s Day: he sees it as a scam, especially because of women’s high expectations.

“The women that are upholding [its] culture, wanting to get taken out, [while] not reciprocating the same energy.”

For him, dating is meeting someone he can call “the mother of [his] kids,” and Toronto’s dating scene just isn’t offering that. So, unless you’re very deep in a relationship with someone, he believes Valentine’s Day is a scam.

Got a dating story for us? We want to hear it! Send your experiences to news@nowtoronto.com for a chance to be featured in a future edition of This Is Dating Now.